Love is not physical, emotional, or verbal abuse. Love is patient, kind, gentle, understanding, truth....I pray that you will experience this love through God (Jesus Christ), and your eyes will open to know that what you're experiencing is not love at all.
You have got to find the strength in God and in yourself to take a stand, and say I will not take or accept this abuse anymore.
You're worth it!
Sep 01, 2014
me by: Anonymous
My husband beats me too. He just got done punching me on the bed and whacking me with a broom stick. It's crazy, but sometimes i wish he would kill me because i don't know how to get away. I'm hurting which ever it goes. I'm so unhappy. As soon as he barely starts to get my trust back, he pulls something so shady. This fight started because he thought i was going to sleep and when i got up he was doing something on his phone. I asked to see what he was doing because he was trying to hide it. It all just escalated so fast. This isn't the first time he hits me. Sometimes i think it's my fault because i don't know how to keep my mouth shut. I get so mad at his actions that hurt me on the inside I start to talk s*** which turns into him being angry and putting his hands on me. He will probably kill me one day, but I hate my life anyway. I feel like in that moment if that's what sets me free from the abuse than I don't care. It's not just physical, its emotional too. He calls me a fat bitch and tells me to shut the f*** up . He wakes up angry at me. I don't actually believe the things he tells me because I think I'm beautiful and if he thinks that badly of me than why doesn't he just go away. I don't understand it. It's not like he can't go find another girl or get another life. I didn't marry a man. I married a hateful wife-beater.I never thought this would be me. I never put up with anything from any of my boyfriends and here I am trying to find myself again. One thing I do know anyway you put it, this isn't love. Love doesn't leave marks and bruises. Love doesn't make you feel so empty on the inside. I feel like I'm here and I'm existing but I'm lifeless. My soul is broken. I miss being happy, genuinely happy. I miss the butterflies, i miss looking at him and knowing that's my home. I miss how when he held me no other place in this world felt safer. Now I sleep with my worst enemy and it's not my safe home anymore. I wish I could have had a marriage that could last forever and I would be happy in. I don't even think about a future anymore. I just live day to day.
Aug 10, 2014
wake up, a man that loves you Will not hurt you. by: maria
Get out for your kids sake. A man that loves you will not hurt you. I stood in a miserable long 18 year marriage only to have my husband cheat on me at the end and get another girl pregnant. The only reason I stayed in this hell hole of a marriage was because when I first left him he threatened me and told me"if you leave me, I will kill you." I believed him. I didn't know better. If I had left him then, I would have been happier and I probably would have been successful by now. My life was on hold for 18 years due to this scrum bag that only lived to make my life a living hell. I am now in a wonderful relationship. Don't give up. Love is not something you look for. Love will come to you. Good luck.
Feb 10, 2014
I know how you feel. by: Anonymous
I have been with my husband for 13 years. We have 4 children and he just punched me 5 times and kicked me three times while I was on the ground dizzy from him punching me.
I always want to hope it will stop but it never does. I don't know what to do. I know I need to leave, I just don't know how...
Oct 19, 2013
I can relate by: Anonymous
My husband too was in an abusive prior relationship and swore it was his crazy ex and he would never lay a violent hand on me. He told me he worshipped me and I was his queen. For the last year and a half he has beaten me and left large dark bruises over my body at least once or every other month. He has even herniated my back. I don't know why I stay. It's hard when you love someone. I know I deserve better. I know I do.
Sep 29, 2012
I believe in you by: Anonymous
Your story has definitely touched me, and I commend you for sharing your experience with the rest of us. First off, I would like to tell you that I do not feel sorry for you. I believe that you are going through a phase in your life that is hard to bare, but I believe that as long as you hold on to *hope*, you are going to overcome this situation. I do not know you, but I see you as a strong woman.
I've read a few other comments on here, and by some responses, it seems that many are viewing your story as (black and white) but coming from a woman who has been in your position, I do not see it that way. I think you should (first off) admit to someone (friend or family) that your husband is abusive. Sometimes when you're a victim of domestic violence it's almost embarrassing to admit the situation. Trust me... there is nothing worse then going through this feeling alone and isolated from friends and family. You need support and understanding.
Remember this one thing... you are not weak. Yes, you are human, but you're not weak just because you chose to stay with a man who doesn't treat you right. But as a woman, you must know you are worthy. It doesn't matter what your husband tells you; you ARE worthy, and your situation WILL turn out to be better than what's been.
I think you would be interested in reading my debut (ebook) novel. It's called, The Cycle of Resentment. For many of my readers, they've described my novel as a *revelation*. It has so far changed lives. (even for those whom have never even experienced the harsh world of Domestic violence and abuse).
please visit me at Amazon/Kindle (ebook) on sale for only $1.99.
I sincerely wish you nothing but success, love, and support. Don't give up!
Mesha Barton
Jul 20, 2012
Domestic violence by: Anonymous
Domestic violence is preventable in so many cases and ends up occuring solely because a woman rewarded bad behaviour and went out with a bad boy. This world is not going to get better, and these things will continue to happen, as long as people continue to reward bad behavior. I am 100% against domestic violence but please, women out there, you have to do your part and not date these animals to begin with. Society can’t continue to bail you out. A fire department will come to your house and put out a fire but if you continue to set the house on fire after they leave, we got a problem.
Apr 18, 2012
thanks for the concern by: Anonymous
I know that there is a posability that things could escalate to more violence, it has before. But how could I ruin my childrens image of me? He isn't always mean. There are times that he is real sweet to me. Plus he has some health problems and I'm just flat out terrified that no one will ever love me again! I have been with guys like him since I was 13. I have no friends and I'm not sure if my family cares too much. My sisters know he has done these things and yet they are friends with each other. I don't drive, I have no money and no where to go. And to think of what he would do scares me even more! I really love him and I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I wasn't with him. I do apperciate your concern and I do dream of a better life for myself and my kids and just don't know if it will be a reality.
Apr 14, 2012
GET OUT! IT IS A CYCLE! by: Anonymous
Your story sounds like all of "Our" stories. It is not going to get better and could even lead to your death. I am a survivor of an attempted murder from my former spouse. I can say everything you have said and I heard all the people say it won't end well, you can't change him and your life could be in danger. I too didn't listen, but it did happen. I am just lucky enough to survive. It is just one big cycle that continues to revolve. Here is the perfect example I found on a domestic violent website. I am positive every person involved in a domestic violent situation can agree with the entire cycle. Plese get help and get out of there asap before it is too late.
Physical Violence - Any unwanted touch including hitting, pushing, slapping, kicking, pulling, pushing out the door, not letting you leave, driving recklessly, pulling hair, pinching, etc
Abuse usually happens in a kind of cycle, or it repeats itself over and over again in similar patterns. In this cycle the offender and the victim are caught in this pattern and neither are aware of how the cycle just keeps continuing. Over time, it is most likely that the kinds of abuse will become more violent, or more hurtful. After the Abuse comes the Excuse Making: The partner and/or the victim rationalize the abuse. The one who committed the abuse may say he or she did not mean to do it, or they could not help themselves, that the victim must try harder, work harder to love better and do what they want, or if you were more perfect the abuse would not happen. Sometimes the victim believes this message and thinks that if he or she could just try hard enough the abuse would not have happened.
Honeymoon: Things seem great at this stage. The offender apologizes and we make new promises. The victims may get presents, or new apologizes that the abuse won't happen again. Many time victims feel good at this stage and are hopeful that the abuse if finally over.
Routine: The two people return to their normal life with the normal ups and downs of everyday.
Tension Stage: Tension is building. The victim of the abuse can tell things are starting to upset the abuser and they begin to start walking "on eggshells" to avoid triggering the abuse.
Trigger: Something sets off the abuser. I’m late getting home or I forgot to fill the gas tank or the laundry isn’t folded or I was too nice to the grocery clerk.
Abuse Occurs: It happens again. The victim and offender move back into excuse making and the cycle continues all over again.
Apr 13, 2012
just move already... by: Anonymous
just get out already.. get a lawyer. Let them make the decision on how to get you out. and you just plan your escape route..