Comments for Still Living With The Person Who Hits Me Almost Every Other Day a.k.a My Husband.

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Dec 21, 2015
 your stronger than you think
by: Anonymous

I am a survivor of domestic violence and I left my ex with three children to raise. I had no job, but with the support of a domestic violence advocate I regained my confidence and found a job. I have since completed a bachelor's degree in Criminal Justice and I am now a victims advocate for domestic violence victims. I help women become survivors. You will be surprised when you leave the relief you will feel at being able to make your own decisions with no one criticizing you or abusing you. This is also traumatic for your child. Find help at your local shelter for domestic violence and get out of there before your child has no mother. You don't want him raising your child.
Oct 20, 2015
 Nice post
by: Anonymous

I want to say that this article is amazing, great written and come with approximately all vital information. I'd like to peer more posts like this. So nice to discover someone with genuine thoughts on this issue.
Sep 02, 2015
 You are a Strong Woman
by: Anonymous

I was raised in a domestic violent home, and I wished my mother had gotten out. Forty years later she still deals with abuse. The physical abuse has stopped, but she's miserable because the verbal and emotional abuse continues. I encourage you to leave if you haven't already. There are many resources to help abused women to get out of violent relationships or marriages. You are a woman of strength because, strength comes from our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Don't rob your daughter of the opportunity to live in a home with love, peace, joy, and happiness. Don't rob yourself of the opportunity. But, this only comes if you change your environment. It is my prayer that God will give you the courage to step out on faith, and move forward in your life with your daughter. You can do all things through Christ which strengthens you. Phil 4:13
Feb 26, 2015
 you are strong
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm willing to reach out to you to let you know that your a strong woman. You don't need a man to take care of you and your child. Somewhere deep down in you is that person you have been forced to hide, but with me walking alongside you will find her again. Don't live with broken promises. Be heard!
Just let me know what I can do to help.
Feb 22, 2015
 Friends & Family
by: Anonymous

My husband has been mentally abusive as well as physically. We've been together for 17 years until I left 3 days ago. I never told anyone what was happening until last week when I finally confessed to friends and family. My isolation and embarrassment served the abuse. When I finally spoke up to a trusted friend, and the good people on the other line to the Natl Dom Abuse hotline, I was able to gather enough strength to run away. I left with nothing but 2 suitcases and my life. I'm living in a friends basement and have no idea what the future holds. I struggle with feelings of remorse and humiliation but I have my life entact. Had I remained I would surely be dead in a months time either by his or my own hands. What is life worth? Friends and family are ready to take you in and help you heal through the chaos. There are a miriad of social service networks capable of helping you through it. I pray for you and your infant that you will be shown a way out and given the strength to end your torture. God Bless
Feb 16, 2015
 I hope you got out!
by: Elizabeth

Dear sweet, loving momma! Please tell me that you have left him, or have gained the courage to leave him! I've been in your same shoes and would love to talk to you more, I just left 3 weeks ago and have a 2 month old little baby boy! I know you are strong enough to raise your baby girl by yourself! You've got this!

Best of luck!

Elizabeth
Jan 13, 2015
 Hope you are alive
by: Anonymous

I just found this website and read your story, so similar to my own. I met my ex-husband, Rob, while married to my first. I was young and dumb, and in a hopeless marriage. So my abuser, Rob, took advantage of my vulnerability. There was an immediate physical attraction- but we were both married. We didn't care, we pursued each other. He gave me so much wanted attention and the thrill of seeing one another in secrecy was mind boggling. We both filed for divorce and began to seriously date. Rob had me now, he had given me so much, sacrificed his marriage, and thought he could do whatever he wanted to me. So our first big fight= he pulled out a knife and threatened to kill himself if I left him. I believed him. Then I said something to set him off. THere it was, he slammed my head into the door trim and I blacked out. I heard "You made me do it", "I;m sorry", the works. He was the first man to ever lay a hand on me and verbally/emotionally abuse me. And what do you know, I found out I was pregnant a month later. I just couldn't catch a break. Maybe it was karma? NO! It wasn't-he was a bastard, no literally he was. Mom was a heroine addict and dad an alcoholic. Rob was raised by his grandparents. So he had an issue with women.
during my pregnancy, I would call my psychologist, who was my previous psychology teacher, and she would always say, "you have a choice to make". Lots of abuse endured throughout my pregnancy and none of my friends knew.. I didn't have many since Rob ensured he kept me away from them and insulted them continuously. Then my son was born-the most beautiful baby ever. I was breastfeeding him and Rob started an argument. While holding my baby, Rob grabbed my hair and hit my head on the headboard a few times. I finally called the police- he was locked up. I was so scared, afraid he would get kicked out of the military, worried about him being in a jail cell- what the hell was wrong with me? I had to get my shit together to be a healthy mom for my newborn. Yet, I picked him up at the prison the next day. I was ridiculous. I deployed overseas for 45 days unfortunately, and finally told my close friend what he was doing- it was so liberating. I was 4,000 miles away and he couldn't touch me. Then I went home. Two months later Rob went away to a school for 6 weeks. This was my chance to get my life in order, hide things at my friends house and get rid of him. I was preparing, and it felt good. Two months later was the perfect time. He hit me on the military base, I went to my boss (who knew nothing) and he called the cops. THat's it-he was ordered to stay on base and away from me. It wasn't all roses yet, we had to do divorce proceedings, custody battle, etc. He threatened to kill me if i didn't do joint custody, so I did. Dumb, dumb, dumb. Worst mistake ever. He couldn't kill me, he loved the military, loved to be in charge and tell people what to do. He was full of shit. 4 years later, I gained control of my life, of Rob, and found my true love. Years of counseling and Zoloft were my savior.

GO, go to a safe house, hide, there are resources, just go. Your child will thank you later. Mine did. Hugs.
Dec 21, 2014
 you dont have to do this
by: Anonymous

I am the daughter of an abused mother. The situation you are in is doing no one any good. Your children will grow up thinking that this abusive environment is normal and eventually when they become old enough to understand, they will become spiteful. If one day your husband hurts your daughter, she will be angry with you for staying with him. You have to leave. Don't turn yourself into the victim, you can get help from family and leave and figure out the finances once you get away from him. No reason is good enough to stay with a man like that. And don't wait too long ... Don't wait till you don't know how to live without his abuse.
Nov 09, 2014
 Choose where you want to be?
by: Anonymous

Home, a life with your daughter,teaching her to value herself by your example.
Death, prematurely by the hands of one that did not create you.
When you have an opportunity to walk away from it all, as it will be stated in the criminal justice system.
When you have dreams of inflicting bodily harm, it is time to go...by your choice far far away from people that you know and start over.
Nov 06, 2014
 Soldier
by: Jessica H.

I am a survivor of an abusive relationship. After 5 years of bruises and defending my boyfriend.... I left. Mind you, I left because I got kicked out of our home together.. but I had the strength to move on and get over him. It took me a full year to do so..... it has been almost three years now and I finally met the REAL man of my dreams.

You can do it. If you can't do it for yourself..do it for your daughter. You deserve so much more.... you really do... i know you are tired of hearing it, but trust me. I'm 23. I was 16 when my ex and i started dating and i wasted so much time with the wrong person.

Be a soldier. do what is best for you and your daughter. I hope you find the strength ..or i hope you are out of it already. There is more ot life, than what our parents want us to do..or our husbands..or what our church tells us... DO IT. You can survive soldier.
Oct 31, 2014
 I hope this helps
by: Anonymous

My husband like yours beat me, No exception,,, not tolerated. When I called the police after a night of throwing my 4 month old baby on the bed and beating me senseless I left and had him charged. when the female police office interviewed me... she asked me if I was on a promise ?? I had no idea what that meant. Apparently, it meant was I supposed to have sex with him....I was beaten flawed and devastated.
Bby, stay strong, work out a financial plan and get out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anything is better than where you are know. Gather family support and out him. Protecting him makes him stronger. Do it in secret. Bus money, one week of accommodation, salvation army will help you through it....please speak with them. love and hugs, Paula
Oct 24, 2014
 Love is not real
by: Anonymous

Wow! that is so sad especially because im going through the same thing so i know your pain just know God is always there for you. Pray!Take Care of Yourself and Your Daughter.
Oct 22, 2014
 similar
by: Anonymous

I also thought i was gonna live out my happily ever after with my husband. I also went against every one I love the most. I feel like you when you speak of love. It makes me sick. My husband punches me, slaps me, spits on me, pulls my hair out, rips my clothes off, and verbally abuses me. He isolates me from my family and so on, and so on. My husband choked me. My vocal chords are messed up I can never sing my favorite song again. Knowing that he did these things to me over and over within six months of being married, I can't explain myself; my actions, why I can love him still, why I care about him still, why I talk to him still. At this moment I'm away from him for the past 4 weeks. It's not the first time I left I always went back. A part of me wants to. I don't wanna die. I love life. I love me. I love my kids, but I love my husband. I am also so confused and embarrass I've been told to keep faith, believe in the Lord, Almighty God, Himself. To worry about nothing, but pray for everything. I wanna share with you pain endures for a night but joy comes in the morning. I really don't have the answers or I would not be in this situation, but I do relate to your situation in some ways and I hope for a better tomorrow for you and your baby. You need to know that you helped me this evening and I say thank you!
Jul 16, 2014
 I'm worried about you
by: Maria

I just read your story and I'm worried about you and your daughter. I understand that you have no place to go but there are shelters out there specifically for women in your shoes. This is wrong. You need to get a restraining order and get out. You are doing exactly what he wants. God didn't call for you to be anyone's slave. You are allowing this by sticking around. You are his punching bag. Domestic violence shelters can help you move out and find counseling for you. Your baby didn't ask for this. She will always have a dad. Just not one with a bad example. Get help and get out safely. Good luck.
Jul 02, 2014
 You can do it
by: Danica Gale

Read blogs, etc. to figure out the best/safest way to get out with your daughter. It's very scary but you will probably find that it is inevitable. One Mom's Battle is a good by Tina Swithin. There are many, many women on there who have been trough the same thing you have. I also have a blog: http://torn-whybatteredwomenstay.com . I hope you can find some hope in this. You CAN get out. Fight for your daughter. Do your research. Knowledge is power. Have a plan for getting out safely! Best of luck!!! You're not alone.
Jun 11, 2014
 Your turn, fight back!
by: Jackie

Your daughter is learning that it is okay to treat a women this way. Would you want her to stay with a man that does this to her? She will stay because you did.

I have children and left for this very reason. My boys need to know it's not okay to treat a women this way and it's not okay to live in fear.

Fight back! Get a restraining order, tell friends and family. Get a support system around you and get out! It is scary, terrifying actually but what's worse is staying and reliving it every day. Subjecting our kids to him.

Praying you break free.
May 20, 2014
 To your future
by: Anonymous

Never say you can't. You can do this. Find the strength within yourself to get out. Make a plan. Get out for yourself and your daughter- you both deserve it.
Apr 09, 2014
 Do not give up
by: Annette

Hello friend, Don't think that you are all alone in this. Times are not like they were years ago when domestic violence was not a big issue like it is today. Years ago when I was with my ex-husband/abuser, I felt the same way, I felt like there was no where for me to go, and no one for me to call. Do not think that your family will not be there for you, because I felt that way also. They knew my ex before I did, and they tried to tell me not to mess with him. Of course, I didn't listen. Your family loves you and will always be there for you.My family ended up taking me and 5 children into their homes, we were split up for a little while but at least my babies and myself were out of danger. I have so much more to say because I went through a nightmare also, but even though you're not there anymore, it never goes away, and guilty feelings always seem to pop up.
Feb 13, 2014
 To Your Future and Hope
by: Pam - Website Creator

My Dear Friend,

Thank you for sharing your story and reaching out! You CAN live through this and MUST for your daughter, but it has to come from within you! You CAN do this!!

You fought to have this person in your life, now fit to get him out for you and your daughter.

I believe we are created for a purpose and no one else has a right to change what we are created for. God sees us as His priceless treasures, who is an abuser to rate our value differently?

I hope you are able to find all of the help you need on this website, but there is a wealth of information and assistance for you!

http://www.thepixelproject.net/ is a wonderful source for assistance.

http://www.hotpeachpages.net/europe/europe1.html#Germany is attached with the pixel project and is an International Directory of Domestic Violence Agencies.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS ALONE. Be careful, use a safe computer, and survive! I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Lovingly, Pam

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