I read your story and I have to tell you that I'm very impressed with the strength and wisdom you've shown in dealing with your abusive situation at such a young age. And you are still very young. I've been through a very similar experience and believe me the scars stay with us. It's so important that you try and discover the root cause of why you were attracted to that kind of toxic love in the first place. And learn how to really heal - at a spiritual level so that you can attract and sustain a healthy, mutually supportive relationship. Just never look or go back. I'd like to invite you to visit my blog on dealing with abuse. It's been years since I left my ex-husband who tried to kill me. But over the years I have found myself drawn to the same type of man. You are young enough to discover the whys and move on to a fulfilling relationship. www.faithhopeandlattes@blogspot.com
Jul 29, 2012
Best not to answer by: Anonymous
I know this can be hard, but next time he emails you its best not to answer. For a guy like that, any response, even a negative one is enough to encourage him to bother him again. Best to save it somewhere in cyberspace as proof but do nothing more.
Jul 11, 2012
Forgive Yourself by: Anonymous
It was not your fault. I agree with EVERYTHING your mom said. Now please don't continue to let him rent space in your head, life, or heart.
I commend you for the steps you've taken! Keep up the good work!
Jul 02, 2012
Done Hiding the Truth by: Jo
Thanks for sharing your story. I, too, got involved in a long term relationship when I was young but did not have the courage to leave sooner like you had the courage to. I remained in it for 20+ years. You sound like a strong woman who has grown wiser from this experience. I love how you responded to this monster who e-mailed you, wanting to befriend you. If you have a chance, please read my book called 'Pretend No More, My Healing from Domestic Violence' It tells my story through poetry and sketches. Like you, I feel stronger and wiser and wanting to hide the truth any longer. Thanks again.
May 24, 2012
Contemplate. by: Anonymous
You gone through so much and you haven't faltered. You learned that everything happens for a reason, the hard way. You did not reach out at the time because you felt that it wasn't much. Then you finally realized you had enough! Now your past makes you what you are today. To read your story is heartbreaking, but also inspirational. You probably have a lot of youths looking up to you as I type.
As a role model you share your story with them, maybe. Or you probably let it be the basis of what you are teach these youths. What i'm trying to get at is that you don't let them down. That you keep persevering, don't you dare give up. You probably have a lot of family that supports you or not, but either way you have the strength and courage to do what you believe is right.
Forgiveness as your mother was speaking about is a very special thing. Although, forgiveness isn't something said nor is it just some plain out lie. It's a gesture. Something that can't be defined in our morals of society. We believe that we can define God in a dictionary, but we can't define him in our lives. I believe God put you through this to set you on a path of greater value you to him. Don't get it mixed up that being successful means having all the money or the glory of fame. Remember that you are not alone in this world, people care about your story. Especially your brother as he writes this, he asks for forgiveness.
For all those nights he stood at the door..listening, crying. For the nights were he can hear you scream and not do anything about it. For the time he walked in at one point and that man tried to put the blame on you. For all those times you gave him signs that you are HURTING. For those times when he couldn't be an adult and give you all the shit that you don't deserve.
But hear him out. The major he's pursuing is because of you. To help others with their turmoils. To give them insight about a greater being or just comfort. He's had so many things that happened around him and also things that have happened to him that you don't know yourself. But like I said, remember as i type this. He loves you.
Feb 09, 2012
You're not alone by: CTLC
Hello and thank you for sharing your story with me. I guess I am lucky to have a great support system but it wasn't till after when I finally began talking about it. The 'abuse' has made my mother and I much closer and she's always there for me. I'm sure you're mother is looking down on you and smiling at you that your life is getting better. It's never too late to support a loved one alive or not.
I too am living a much more happier life. Since that relationship I have learned so much about myself and I'm still having to cope with the bad memories but every day is just another great opportunity for change. I wish you all the best and I know God is watching over all of those whom are suffering in silence. God Bless
Nov 10, 2011
You're Not Alone by: Anonymous
http://mypaintedpicasso.blogspot.com/
I too was abused and it started at the age of 13. I thought it was okay. Be lucky you have a great mother to lean on and hear your story. My mother had known about it for a decade and did nothing. From that I thought it was okay. My mother is no longer with me now and she did apologize on her deathbed. I have been free from him for 6 years now and life is just getting better and better. It's awesome to share your story and know that you're not alone. Im 30 and I know I still have a lot of life to live. Never stop talking about it.
Sep 26, 2011
LOVE, FORGIVENESS, PRAYER by: Mae Lizama
SweetHeart,
You have met the first step of this abuse that haunts you; and that is "LOVE"! The Lord reminds us everyday that the only "LOVE" you need is through him. With him you'll be able to acquire the forgiveness. And the "Forgiveness" begins with you first.
Forgive yourself first from all the "has beens" (i.e. I should've, Could've, etc.) and the negativity of the experience you received by this awful ordeal will be embraced by the Lord.
Offer your hauntings, tauntings, and "AWFUL" memories to the Lord, as you wake in the morning, during the day, and especially at night when you want to sleep in peace. For only the Lord can give you peace and humility.
Pray daily for those who are being abused, and most especially for those who are the abuser. For its them who needs alot of healing, because they are not as strong as you to Stand Up & Speak Up of their actions.
My daughter "I AM SO PROUD OF YOU"!
I pray everyday that you will heal from the ugly past you have endured. I also pray that you embrace your life now whole heartedly with the Lord for He has made you His pupil for a reason.
The Lord has granted you His grace and He'll always be at your side through all your trials and tribulations. And most especially as you help all other victims whom are going through the "ugliness" of "Abuse"..